Theory of Delusion: Rai Side
by Icebender21
Summary: Sometimes we can’t accept the way we are. Looking at ourselves in the mirror, we are often disgusted at the thing looking back at us. This is how a façade is formed. Semi one-sided RaixJack; the other side of Theory of Delusion.


**Disclaimer**: I've often been curious about the inner workings of the mind of Raimundo Pedrosa. Did the creators of Xiaolin Showdown purposefully make him the arrogant, rude jerk that he is, or could it be that there's something underneath it all? Who cares? I'm just here to mess with his pretty little head! All rights to the proper creators!

**Summary**: Sometimes we can't accept the way we are. Looking at ourselves in the mirror, we are often disgusted at the thing looking back at us. This is how a façade is formed. No one must know of the real you. The repulsive, beleaguered you. But by trying to hide the true version of yourself, you only make it that much more obvious to those you've been trying to hide from. Semi one-sided RaixJack; the other side of Theory of Delusion.

**Warning**: Raimundo's an angsty asshole while he tries to sort out his feelings for Jack. If boys possibly having feelings for other boys offends you, then please go read some hardcore yaoi lemons until it has become your new obsession in life.

And after of month of promising to write the other side, here it is! For those of you who haven't read Theory of Delusion ~Jack Side~… well, you don't really have to. I mean, I would appreciate it if you went back and read that, but it's not necessary to understand what's going on here. Since the other one didn't really have a time setting, I wonder if I can get away with making this take place a couple of weeks later. Yes, that shall due nicely! Onward to the angsty Raimundo! I hope the ending doesn't seem too abrupt… Oh yeah, feed my ego and review!!!

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**Theory of Delusion ~Rai Side~**

I hate that freaking albino scientist. I wish he would just do the world a favor and _drop dead_!! The world doesn't need people like him! People with his… _disease_! I still can't believe I let him get close enough to—

No! I can't think about it! If I think about it, I'll wind up being a messed-up fag like him! I can't even think his name; that's how bad it is! Ugh, why'd the others make me be the one who had to do that stupid showdown? I won, naturally, but what came after it was just… sick. Damnit, I'm thinking of it again!

Fucking hell, what is he trying to do to me?! He keeps worming his way into my thoughts to the point where I can't even think straight anymore! It's not fair! Why do I have to be like this anyway? Why not Omi or Clay? They're a hell of a lot gayer than I am, if you ask me!

Ew, what if the two of them secretly make out after practice or something?! That is so gross! I don't even wanna think about at!

…

Ah! I can't stop thinking about it! Damn you, Jack Spicer! You're the one who went and put all these fucking gay thoughts in my head! Why'd you have to kiss me like that, you sick freak?!

At the time when it happened, I wasn't sure what to think. One minute he was bitching me out about how it was all our fault that his life was so pathetic, and the next, he had me on the ground raping my poor mouth for all it was worth. I was scared. A part of me actually liked that shit! But it was only because he's so girly! Yeah, that's it! His parents should've named him Jacqueline!

It… it just didn't make any sense…

"Jack, what're you—" I remember gasping after he pulled away from me. I didn't have to finish asking what the hell he thought he was doing because the freak moved and kissed me again! It was different from the first one, though. This time, he was lot more fierce and I swear I could taste cinnamon-flavored bubble gum… Gross!

Or was it really? It tasted kinda… nice. But that's only because I liked cinnamon flavored gum! I had run out that day and had to swipe a stick of spearmint from Clay. Believe me, if that creep hadn't tricked me with gum, his ass would've been begging for mercy and not in the good way either!

Argh! Leave me alone, stupid gay thoughts!

I must've gotten caught up in the heat of the moment or something, 'cause the next thing I knew my hand gone all the way from my side to the back of his small neck and I wasn't even trying to get away from him anymore. My body wouldn't listen to me. It was so weird. We both knew I was so much stronger than him, so why was _I _letting _him_ kiss me like I was the girl? He had to have used to hidden Shen-Gong-Wu.

Definitely.

That absolutely _had_ to be it! Why else would I let someone, another _dude_, stick his tongue in my mouth? Why else would my hands have started moving up his shirt? Why else would I let him run his hands through my hair like I was some sort of puppy?

After our tongues stopped struggling (with me the victor, naturally), he pulled away from me and looked me in my eyes. His fag magic must've gotten to me 'cuz I wasn't the least bit freaked out by this. But y'know, I had pretty much just made out with the guy, so it would've been stupid to be freaked out _now_!

Stupid brain, stop trying to reason this out.

The next thing I know, Spicer had pushed _me_ away like _I_ was the diseased one. Can you believe the nerve that guy has?!

"Dude, what gives?" I asked, panting somewhat from breathlessness. The jerk turned his back on me; ignoring me! He didn't even answer me right away, just took his sweet gay time straightening up that darkly-colored shirt of his.

"It was my turn."

What? What the hell was he talkin' about, 'his turn'? I guess he must've read the confusion both on my face and in my silence.

"Tell me, Raimundo, did you… enjoy what I did to you?"

Of course I didn't enjoy that! What the fuck do you think, you freak?! Yeah… that's what I thought. Why didn't I say any of it out loud though? I felt my cheeks burning. Damnit! I bet my face was redder than Jack's stupid hair color!

"How does it feel to have a taste of your medicine? I gave you something you enjoyed and took it away just as quickly. Weren't those your exact words? 'So you can't have them'?"

At those words, my face got even redder. That time, it wasn't out of embarrassment though. That smug tone of his really pissed me off! Argh! I couldn't even form words, I was so angry! All I did back then was spit out complete bullshit!

"I don't know what you're problem is!" I raged, finally having found my voice. "There's no way I'd ever let that shit happen again! I'm not a goddamned fag like you, Spicer!" I swear I saw him smile as I screamed this. "You're sick! You're sick in the head! I hope you burn in Hell!!"

And then I grabbed the Longi Kite and took off as fast as my artificial wings would carry me under my elemental powers. That… that sicko! He was trying to get inside my head; I _know_ it! As soon as I got back to the temple, I dropped off the new Shen-Gong-Wu (I didn't even remember picking it up) in the vault and held myself up in my cube-like domicile. I couldn't tell anyone. No one could know. Not Kimiko, not Clay, not Omi, especially not Dojo, and not even Master Fung!

This is fucked up. This is _really_ fucked up!! How the hell did that little fag get inside my head to the point where he's all I think about? And his words… that was the worst part! A part of me really wanted to kiss him again. And another part of me wanted to do much more than that. I wanted to grab that snow-skinned genius and make sweet love to him just like any guy would do to a beautiful, voluptuous, well-developed girl.

Like a girl. Just like a girl. Not a man at all. Because men aren't supposed to have these urges for other men.

I'm not gay.

**End~**


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